Note Worthy Musings Archives - Balancing Your Needs

Balancing Your Needs

In last week’s article I spoke to the fact that anxiety, fear and worry can get the best of you at times when you least expect it – or it can be a looming feeling that you drag with you throughout your days.

And in looking up the word Anxiety on dictionary.com – this is one of the definitions I found: Anxiety: distress or uneasiness of mind caused by fear of danger or misfortune. I also found this definition: earnest but tense desire; eagerness.

Interesting how the two definitions seem on to be on two different ends of the spectrum. One refers to a constant feeling of uneasiness and expecting the worst – and the other refers to wanting, eagerness and a ‘tense desire’ – almost implying that anxiety is a tool or symptom of motivation.

Have you ever thought of it that way? That if you feel anxious, worried, or fearful that those feelings could be habitual? And the feelings were actually unconscious ways you learned (and were taught) to stay motivated, on top of your game, and constantly making changes in order to improve things?

Think about it. If you don’t believe things should be any different than they are, then what is the point right? Haven’t we all been taught in one way or another that you must be doing and achieving in order to feel useful and that you’re contributing in the way you’re meant to contribute?

Yet, my question is – does the journey have to be fraught with constant feelings of discontent?

Consider the antonyms to the word anxiety that I found on Dictionary.com: certainty, serenity, tranquility.

Now those words are more appealing aren’t they? Certainty. Serenity. Tranquility.

I explained in last week’s article that anxiety, fear, and feelings of self-doubt are actually feelings that lay within your body to tell you something. And if you can be courageous enough to go into those feelings they can also teach you some precious insights about your belief system and what you’re actually fearing and expecting is going to happen.

See, when you set-out to make changes, to ‘rock the boat’ and follow your heart, your body and your emotions, and your mind will wreak havoc on you because they are programmed to keep you the same – and keep you right where you are.

Yet, the Truth is – those feelings of fear, anxiety, worry and self-doubt are only coming up inside of you because they are ready to be dealt with and released. And if you can actually begin the process of transferring the energy and realize the Truth which is: you have strong needs for safety and security, yet you also have strong needs to live a life of adventure, excitement and the ability to let your spirit soar.

Like everything in life, it really is all about balance. Allowing yourself to feel safe and secure, while also allowing yourself to feel adventurous, courageous and that you’re honoring your creative free-spirit and where it wants to lead you.

Check-out the Worth Work for this week where I speak to being able to help yourself balance all your needs and to deal with the emotions that crop-up in the process.

Here's some worth-work for this week: Imagine for a moment that you knew everything that was going to happen to you every second of every day. Would be a bit boring wouldn’t it?

You may have needs for certainty and to ‘know’, yet your needs for freedom, adventure and new experiences need to be honored as well – otherwise depression seeps in and that isn’t any fun.

Consider your needs for a moment - your basic needs like safety and security. Are these being met right now? If so, great, if not, how do you need to get them met? Then, go do that.

Then, consider your needs for adventure, fun, and new experiences. Are these all getting met in some way? If so, great, if not, how do you need to get them met? Then, go do that.

Consider this – if you’re setting out to broaden your horizons and doing things that are new and exciting, then you’re going to feel fearful, anxious and worried – that’s the point. And knowing this Truth is empowering because you can simply turn-around the feelings and simply pretend you’re really excited! Try it, it works.

Now consider, that if you’re feeling anxious, worried, fearful, or just plain bummed out – but it’s not because you’re moving in the direction of your dreams, but because you know you aren’t, then consider your needs for safety and security may be met, but your other needs for adventure and freedom may not be.

Honor where you are right now. Honor the balance that you need to feel whole. And then, ask yourself – am I feeling that balance? Or am I dishonoring parts of myself because maybe my needs to feel safe and secure are completely winning-out and taking over – and trumping the needs of my soul and creative expression?

Contemplate on all of this – and as always, be gentle, patient, and loving towards yourself because in Truth, you’re right where you need to BE!